The Story of Us - Part 12

I'm just not good at staying mad at people. It just takes too much effort to keep up the cold shoulder and the pretending like I don't care. So eventually I give up. Remember how I was really mad at Josh and was totally fine not talking to him again? Yeah, that lasted a solid two days once we both were back at school. By that Tuesday, I was over not being friends and so I cautiously sent him a text to see if he wanted to sit with my friends and I at devotional, since that's what he did all Winter semester. I wasn't all that surprised, though, when he replied that he was going to sit with his girlfriend instead, but thanked me for the offer.

A few hours later, I was heading home from work, when I got another text from Josh. I was surprised, but even more surprised by what he told me.

He said that he no longer had a girlfriend.

I didn't quite know to say because I didn't quite understand why he had told me. But I won't deny that I had a little bit more spring to my step the rest of the way home.

That night, I was volunteering for a campus party, when I was again surprised when I got a text from Josh. This time I didn't feel quite so happy after reading it. Josh told me that even though he and Tiffany were no longer officially boyfriend and girlfriend, they were still going to date some. Are you serious?!?! Why would you do that, and more importantly, why are you telling me?!?! I managed to answer back "Good luck with that", before I threw my phone at my purse, and didn't respond the rest of the night.

But the heart makes us do crazy things sometimes.

At church, people receive callings, or jobs, from things like teachers to leaders. For spring semester, I was called to be one of the ward FHE coordinators, meaning that it was my job to create the FHE groups among the apartments in the ward. As I was waiting for my partner to come over, I was looking at the different apartments, when an idea popped into my head. I almost guiltily arranged the groups in a particular order that placed my apartment and Josh's apartment right across from each other. When my partner arrived, I casually suggested that to make things easy, we could just make the groups by putting the apartments right across from each other together in a group. My partner agreed, and my little plan was set in motion.

Josh and I would now be in the same FHE group, so we would now have to spend at least an hour together every single Monday.

The next Monday was the ward FHE where my partner and I would announce the new FHE groups and all the groups would play a few "get to know you" games. I was very nervous about how Josh might react when he realized we were in the same group. Would he be happy? Annoyed? Would see right through my plan?

When my roommates and Josh's apartment got together for our first game, we played the Human Knot. Just to refresh your memory, everyone gets in a circle and grabs two other people's hands and try to untangle everyone's arms without letting go. Josh was one of the first people to put his hands in, and I didn't want my roommates to get to his hands before I did, but I didn't want to appear to eager, so I tried to act casual (apparently I failed). I could tell Josh instantly felt extremely uncomfortable and so I felt like an idiot.

To compound my embarrassment, while we were eating pizza, I saw that Josh's lock screen on his phone was a picture of him and Tiffany.

What was I doing??

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Little Baby Steps

Image
Lately, I've been feeling the need to share what Josh and I have been going through. This is very close to my heart, and I haven't wanted to talk about it at all. But over the past few weeks, I've had the feeling in my heart that I need to be more open about it. And I've found that the more I talk about it, the better I feel. I'm not sharing to make you feel sorry for me - that's the last thing I want. I just want you to be able to understand. (I'm going to be very blunt and open, so if you don't want to know all that many personal things about me, you might want to skip this post.) Growing up as the oldest of nine children, I learned from an early age how to care for kids. I helped feed my brother when I was 2, changed my first diaper when I was 8, and by 12, I was babysitting for my parents as well as others in my church. I grew to absolutely love babysitting! I loved getting to be with all these adorable children. And so I went from watching...
Read more

Josh's Thoughts

I guess at this point I should just let you all know, if you’re not interested in hearing the emotional side of Josh Guin, you should stop reading now. (I wouldn’t blame you. I tend to get a little wordy when this happens.) As the first sentence of this post suggests, I’m here to talk about the difficulty of having a baby. Specifically, with my wife and I. I’ve been trying to figure out a good way to cope with it and so far, I really haven’t found anything good. So, here I am at 11:42 pm typing away. I hope that you’ll forgive the scattered nature of this post. I don’t do this sort of thing. Since Alaura and I have started trying to have a child, it has been quite a roller-coaster1 of emotions. As I’m sure many of you have experienced, babies can cause a lot of emotion even before they’re in existence. Happiness, sadness, anger, jealousy, etc. All of these emotions can make life very interesting, to say the least. When I met my wife, she was such a fun loving, caring perso...
Read more

The Story of Us - Part 6

After Josh and I had our little chat, Josh kept trying to invite me to do things for a couple more days, but eventually stopped. He would still come around to my apartment to hang out and would sit with my roommates and I at devotional  and church every week, but it wasn't nearly as awkward as before because I didn't feel that pressure that I did when he was actively asking me on dates. And like I've said before, Josh was a good friend and so I was glad our dates hadn't ruined that completely. And I turned my attention back to figuring out if I was going to go on a mission. My mind was almost constantly going back and forth about it and I was getting more and more confused, and I couldn't figure out why. I talked with my parents about it, prayed about it, studied the scriptures, read talks, and such, but was still having this persistent confusion. Then one night when I was kneeling on my bed saying a prayer before bed, I was praying about mission stuff again, when...
Read more