The Story of Us - Part 8

Out in the hall, I didn't waste any time, and taking a deep breath, I asked "So I was just wondering who Tiffany was."

Josh got a nervous look on his face and shifted on his feet before answering. I had a feeling in my gut that I knew what the answer was going to be, but I kept foolishly hoping I was wrong.

"Well, she's a girl I met at volleyball,
 (Please, don't say it. Please, don't say it)
 and we've been dating for a few weeks."

"Oh... ok."

Everything inside of me suddenly felt emptier, slower. I was crushed. And so much more confused. He had still acted like he liked me, and my roommates had told me that he still did... But he really was dating this other girl. Why hadn't he said anything??

I couldn't really think of anything else to say and I just wanted to get away before he could see just how upset I was, so I quickly said goodbye to Josh and went inside.

I didn't want to think about what had just happened, so I focused on something else - singing at the ward social. I almost instantly turned back around and without saying a word to any of my roommates, left the apartment to head to my friend Sydney's house (I could actually see Josh up ahead, still walking home, that's how quickly I had left). My thoughts were racing as I walked, but I wouldn't let myself think about anything else but going and getting this guitar. Playing the song at the ward social suddenly seemed like the most important thing in the world.

By the time I got the guitar, it was almost 11pm, so I didn't stay long at Sydney's before heading back home. On my way home, my phone buzzed, and when I picked it up, I was a little surprised to see a message from Josh.


I was still too chicken to come right out and say that I liked him, and so went about it in a roundabout kind of way, hoping he could read in between what I was saying, and find what I really wanted to say.



Our conversation continued on for a little while, with me trying to explain that I did like him and that I regretted pushing him away, but it became clear fairly quickly that Josh just wanted to be my friend, nothing more. He was going to be my supporter for going on a mission, and he didn't want to distract me anymore from that.

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