The Story of Us - Part 9
You know how sometimes you come across a song that seems that it was written just for you? It almost scarily matches perfectly with what you're going through at that exact moment. It seems to take all of your emotions and crazed thoughts that you don't fully understand, and puts them all together in a little 3 minute package just for you. That was this song for me.
The next day was busy with all of the usual school and homeworkness that comes around finals times, and so I didn't have any time to practice my song until a couple of hours before the ward social was supposed to start. The last time I had played this song was way back in November, and only a couple times then, and so I was starting to think I was crazy for wanting to do this in the first place. My roommates assured me several times that I sounded great, but by the time we got to the Hinckley building for the social, I was a nervous wreck. It didn't help my nervousness any to find out that I was the first person set to perform. I could only get myself to eat a couple of bites of chips before giving up and going into an empty classroom close by to practice a couple more times. After running through the song a couple of times, I started to head back in, but in my nervous haste accidentally dropped the guitar right outside the gym door. I started to panic a little, but luckily Sydney was sitting right inside the door and was able to get it back in tune for me.
By the time Sydney got the guitar tuned up again, they were ready for me. I was nervous and shaky and clutching the guitar so I wouldn't drop it again. I had to walk to the other side of the gym to the chair set up for me to play in, and as I walked, I scanned the room. My roommates were in the far back corner, Sydney had moved up to the front by me (bless her heart), and much to my dismay, sitting next to Sydney was Josh. Why was he up there?? I wanted him to hear the song but not be right in my face when he did.
I sat in the seat, adjusted the mic, introduced my song, took a deep breath, and started to play.
(To be honest, I've been a little hesitant to share what song I sang just because there is so much emotion and meaning behind it for me. So just know that this song is really, really special to me.)
So the song is called "State of Grace" by Taylor Swift, from her album Red. It's a fun, upbeat, well under-appreciated song, and on the deluxe album, she has an acoustic version it. I love the acoustic version almost more than the original because it's simple, but it's beautiful, and you can really focus on the lyrics.
At the moment, I didn't think to have someone record me on their phone or something (something I regret now). Sooo you'll have to make due with listening to Taylor sing her own song :)
The whole time I was singing, I couldn't get myself to look up from my fingers forming each chord. One, because I wasn't quite familiar enough with the guitar to trust my fingers to make the chords on their own. And two, I knew if I looked up, I would look at Josh. And if I looked at Josh, I would mess up. So I decided it was just safer to not look up at all.
My voice sounded so shaky and it was terrifying to hear my voice so loud through the microphone, but Allison assured me later that my voice shaking just sounded like a nice vibrato instead. While I was singing, I could see out of my peripheral that Josh had pulled out his phone, and the only thought that went through my head was, "Oh please don't be recording me!" (He later told me that he had looked up the lyrics to the song so he could read them as I sang).
When I was done, I was really pleased with how I had done, and the whole ward gave me a big applause, with my roommates screaming like maniacs from the back. One guy told me I sounded just like Taylor Swift. After I sat down by my roommates, I was still so shaky and nervous that I couldn't eat any of my sandwich, and so I just sat and listened to everyone else perform.
Partway through all the performances, Josh and Todd got up to leave for volleyball, and Josh stopped at my table to say goodbye. I tried to avoid saying anything to him, so when he told me good job on my song, I barely glanced up at him, and just said "Thanks." And with that, he left.
Had he understood what I was singing? Did he know I sang that song for him? I hoped he did, but I didn't know if anything would happen because of it.
The next day was busy with all of the usual school and homeworkness that comes around finals times, and so I didn't have any time to practice my song until a couple of hours before the ward social was supposed to start. The last time I had played this song was way back in November, and only a couple times then, and so I was starting to think I was crazy for wanting to do this in the first place. My roommates assured me several times that I sounded great, but by the time we got to the Hinckley building for the social, I was a nervous wreck. It didn't help my nervousness any to find out that I was the first person set to perform. I could only get myself to eat a couple of bites of chips before giving up and going into an empty classroom close by to practice a couple more times. After running through the song a couple of times, I started to head back in, but in my nervous haste accidentally dropped the guitar right outside the gym door. I started to panic a little, but luckily Sydney was sitting right inside the door and was able to get it back in tune for me.
By the time Sydney got the guitar tuned up again, they were ready for me. I was nervous and shaky and clutching the guitar so I wouldn't drop it again. I had to walk to the other side of the gym to the chair set up for me to play in, and as I walked, I scanned the room. My roommates were in the far back corner, Sydney had moved up to the front by me (bless her heart), and much to my dismay, sitting next to Sydney was Josh. Why was he up there?? I wanted him to hear the song but not be right in my face when he did.
I sat in the seat, adjusted the mic, introduced my song, took a deep breath, and started to play.
(To be honest, I've been a little hesitant to share what song I sang just because there is so much emotion and meaning behind it for me. So just know that this song is really, really special to me.)
So the song is called "State of Grace" by Taylor Swift, from her album Red. It's a fun, upbeat, well under-appreciated song, and on the deluxe album, she has an acoustic version it. I love the acoustic version almost more than the original because it's simple, but it's beautiful, and you can really focus on the lyrics.
At the moment, I didn't think to have someone record me on their phone or something (something I regret now). Sooo you'll have to make due with listening to Taylor sing her own song :)
The whole time I was singing, I couldn't get myself to look up from my fingers forming each chord. One, because I wasn't quite familiar enough with the guitar to trust my fingers to make the chords on their own. And two, I knew if I looked up, I would look at Josh. And if I looked at Josh, I would mess up. So I decided it was just safer to not look up at all.
My voice sounded so shaky and it was terrifying to hear my voice so loud through the microphone, but Allison assured me later that my voice shaking just sounded like a nice vibrato instead. While I was singing, I could see out of my peripheral that Josh had pulled out his phone, and the only thought that went through my head was, "Oh please don't be recording me!" (He later told me that he had looked up the lyrics to the song so he could read them as I sang).
When I was done, I was really pleased with how I had done, and the whole ward gave me a big applause, with my roommates screaming like maniacs from the back. One guy told me I sounded just like Taylor Swift. After I sat down by my roommates, I was still so shaky and nervous that I couldn't eat any of my sandwich, and so I just sat and listened to everyone else perform.
Partway through all the performances, Josh and Todd got up to leave for volleyball, and Josh stopped at my table to say goodbye. I tried to avoid saying anything to him, so when he told me good job on my song, I barely glanced up at him, and just said "Thanks." And with that, he left.
Had he understood what I was singing? Did he know I sang that song for him? I hoped he did, but I didn't know if anything would happen because of it.
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